Maybe this should be the proper title for this far too long blogpost?
Some of you already know - but I wanted to share the news with all of you, partly to excuse my constant absence on the blog and in the social media in the last months. I had a really good reason for being away, quiet and not here - besides travelling and teaching of course.
I was moving.
When I'm saying that, I mean MOVING, with capital letters and all the good and bad things included. Because, you know, when I'm planning to do something I sometimes go big. Or BIG, really. Possibly because one day in the past I allowed myself to be fearless (sometimes it can be mistaken for careless too) and I am a dreamer... and what is even more scary, I tend to believe dreams can come true... usually if you close your eyes and jump into the big rabbit hole, screaming.
Yeah, that would be me, probably.
So, it wasn't just moving home, all planned, scheduled, packed, prepared in long distance. No, who, me? Organized??? Impossible. I can reduce my sleep, work my ass off, forget about birthdays, including mine, but I can't tell I'm organized. Chaos is my second name and I've learnt to live with it.
We did it in 2 months - literally. From the moment we've made a decision till the moment we opened the door of our new place passed 8 weeks. And I can only bless my natural ability to push everything forward strong enough to move, including my husband. (Honestly, I think he's sill in kind of shock.)
In these 8 weeks, we've found a place to rent, we've packed all our home including my studio (blessed may be my friends and Mom who helped me tons) and we hired a car to move all of it from our apartment in Warsaw to a new place, over 2200 km away. And in the meantime there were classes, product designing, and everyday life. (I'm not daring to call it NORMAL everyday life. My life is crazy and I try to live with it... nobody's perfect. )
Then, in just a week we had to build everything again from the scratch, unpack and set up in our new home... yes, deadlines were coming, yes I'm lucky to have friends who are willing to help in the case of this kind of emergency. Then there were other challenges: finding all the important places, waiting all the media to be installed, praying for internet to go smooth, making myself comfortable in the new place, learning how to find all my art stuff in the new place, new organization... and getting used to be alone:(
Andrew is still in Warsaw, working, looking after our apartment being redecorated, preparing it for renting... I miss him so much.
So here I am. In Ireland.
The place I loved since I've read the first book of Celtic legend, place that stole my heart completely when we were on our honeymoon trip, driving around the island, smiling like madmen. This is the only place that makes my my heart sing no matter which part of this rainy, cold, windy country I am.
I'm in the beautiful, small town with a round tower and old stone church - and it will only take me few hours now to go to in the places I want to visit again and again. Even driving home through the fields, bushes and sheep walking around wakes up a horde of butterflies in my stomach.
Yes, I'm weird, I accepted that years ago ;)
I can't wait to go to the sea :)
Can I imagine myself in a small, quiet place like this - no big streets, cinemas, restaurants, crowds of people? Me, big city girl? Yes.
I was feeling I needed a quiet space. Closer to the nature, bigger. And I got it.
I was willing to follow one of my biggest dreams, one that started from a talk I had with my newly-wed husband, sitting on the shore of Atlantic Ocean, somewhere near Dingle Town. Or around.
I've decided I want it more than I'm afraid of it, and - thanks to all powers in the universe - my family just gave up fighting to keep us close, understanding our vision of happiness is different than theirs. And there is no point in stopping us - because our hearts already moved.
I'm in a a dream. Now I only need my husband and dog to come... and my friends and family to visit:) Maybe I'm a really hopeless example of housewife and one of the hardest people to be friends with, but... welcome to my new home:) (Hopefully I'll be in, not travelling or working like crazy at this time, so please check before coming, ok? LOL).
I can't say the house I'm in is my final destination - but it was a huge step in the only direction I could imagine. Please, keep your fingers crossed for us - we will surely need it being away from everything we've known for all our lives ;) I keep learning a lot, everyday!
xoxoxoxo
Finn
P.S. Mówiąc w skrócie - w ostatnich tygodniach przeprowadziliśmy nasze życie - dom, moje studio w całkiem nowe, ale bardzo ekscytujące miejsce, o którym zawsze w skrytości ducha marzyłam: do Irlandii. Jak zwykle u mnie był to wariacki plan rodem z bajki, którą niewiele osób zrozumie - ale udało się! Z pomocą przyjaciół i najbliższych, walcząc z czasem i zbliżającymi się terminami zapakowaliśmy wszystko, co było na liście, i rozpakowaliśmy w nowych 4 kątach. Po raz kolejny uwierzyłam, że warto zamknąć oczy, i z krzykiem na ustach skoczyć w króliczą norę... Dziękuję wszystkim za wyrozumiałość, cierpliwość i przepraszam, że tak mało jestem ostatnio z Wami - nie mogłam inaczej, było to fizycznie niemożliwe. Teraz, kiedy już wróciłam mniej więcej do normalnego rytmu pracy mam nadzieję, że mnie będę Was zaniedbywać - trzymajcie kciuki aby wszystko pomyślnie się ułożyło :)
